reader mail: strapless dresses?
catholicinfilmschool on Jun 2nd 2009 01:30 am
A commenter asks:
Are all strapless dresses immodest?
Older readers will know that when it comes to modesty standards, I am all about discernment. I’ve never published a list of rules because you’re not stupid and I don’t like the idea of telling people what to wear as if I’m some sort of authority. On to my answer—
I wear strapless dresses/tops—not very often and usually only in the summer—if they meet a few non-negotiable requirements:
1. Do not show my cleavage neither when I’m upright nor bent over.
2. Do not have to be pulled up every 9.456 seconds.
3. Are not cut low in the back.
Case in point—this dress worn by the lovely Melissa Joan Heart:
As we can see, the structure of the garment is designed in such a way that it stays in place with ease, even with two squirmy little boys on her hips.
I’m wearing a strapless top in my Facebook profile picture, but what you may not have noticed is that I’m wearing what I call a “band bra” which is an absolute staple in my wardrobe. It’s basically a short tube top I have in multiple colors that covers up my cleavage, and it works perfectly for strapless tops and dresses.
Another tip for strapless garments is to wear necklaces and your hair down. You can even put tank tops or other shirts underneath the strapless top/dress for added style.
Hope that helps!
Filed in Fashion Tips, Reader Mail | Comments (8)
I don’t know…I sort of disagree
doesn’t wearing a tube top sort of give men the impression that you are not wearing a bra. I once saw one girl who was not wearing one and showing through without noticing it. Also, if your shoulders are bare, them some guys might tend to picture the rest of your upper body bare..yikes. I won’t want it even to be a temptation. I guess the only reason I would allow them with your guidelines would be at prom or a wedding.
With any outfit, proper undergarments should always be worn. That’s just gross…:)
I should add that my opinion on this comes from conversations with trusted male friends of mine, including very holy priests.
hmmmm…
I think your guidelines are helpful… having said that.. I would think that this is a gray area where I would rather be black…
no strapless for me…
I guess it doesn’t help that I see my neighbor, who wears tube tops that fit the requirements, making out with her boyfriend on her front porch.
I agree with Mariah. I’ve spoken with many holy men who say that the very fact that your dress is held up by your boobs is a problem and can lead to scandal. There is never any reason to wear a strapless dress. If someone took a picture at the right angle, you would look naked, and that is certainly a problem. I have also never found a strapless dress that stayed up the entire time it was worn and didn’t at some point reveal cleavage, and I’m not flat-chested.
Sleeveless, though not my preferred, I would say is not scandalous. Strapless=scandal in my opinion, and I believe the Pope would agree.
I think I would venture into saying that the vast majority of strapless pieces on the market do not fit my standards, as they are dependent on cut, fabric, and overall structure of the garment. I only have two strapless pieces myself.
However, the main point of the post was to say that even though most strapless pieces are immodest, there are ways to style them to make them more modest.
Obviously, the appropriateness of a garment coincides with where it’s being worn. Like I said, I very rarely wear strapless tops/dresses, and only in the summer like if I’m at the beach.
That being said, I would never dream of wearing something strapless to a wedding (which is most likely in a house of worship) just like I wouldn’t wear a strapless dress to the gym.
But we all have different standards…and that’s okay.
I like how Jena says it’s a grey area and would rather err on the side of caution. That’s pretty much how I would feel.